What actually happens in a first session

If you’ve never been to therapy, the first session can feel like a test you haven’t studied for. It isn’t one. There are no right answers, and you can’t do it wrong. Here’s roughly how it goes.

The first few minutes

We start with the practical things: confidentiality and its limits, how sessions work, fees and cancellations. Getting this out of the way usually helps people settle. You’re welcome to ask anything, including questions about how I work.

Then, your story, as much as you like

I’ll ask what brought you here and what you’d like to be different. You might come in with a clear list, or with a vague sense that something is off. Both are fine. You don’t need to tell me everything, and you can tell me if a topic is off limits for now.

You set the pace. Nothing has to be said today.

A few questions

I’ll probably ask about your sleep, work, relationships and any past support you’ve had. I’m not looking for problems. I’m trying to get a picture of your life, including what is already working.

Before we finish

We’ll talk about what stood out and what a next step could look like. For many people that means meeting weekly for a while. If I think someone else would suit you better, I’ll say so and help you find them.

What to bring

Nothing you have to prepare. For an online session, a quiet spot and a charged device are enough. Some people bring a note on their phone, in case nerves take over. That’s a good idea, not a strange one.

It’s normal to feel tired or a little raw afterwards, and also normal to feel relieved. Give yourself a few easy minutes if you can. And if the fit doesn’t feel right, you can say so. Finding the right therapist matters, and it doesn’t always happen on the first try.